Today I have been writing differently than I have in quite some time… I have been sorting out my priorities, resume, and such… I am at that crossroads again, that place that every time I turn seems to be there again… Turn this way, turn that way, and sometimes circle around and around as if on a never ending roundabout looking for the exit… I have been divorced for two years though it feels like last week… I have journeyed through the last few years with very little sight of what lays ahead of me… Every part of me is raw, and desiring to retreat and hide in safety… As much as that is what I would love to do, my guidance is saying something very different… It is time for me to join in a world I thought I had let go of several years ago… Back to work, back to the norm, back to the everyday of this reality…
It is so strange how happy most people are to hear that I will be doing the normal, nine to five job, existence of this reality… My being wants to scream NO, you cannot make me!!! I do not want to do it, and yet it is clearly time to do it… I have been guided to see it as another adventure, not as a death to me… I have to say for the most part I am excited, there is an ease that comes from doing what is expected of you… There is an ease when you are not playing tug-of-war at every turn, insisting that you do not have to be like everyone else…
So now is the time to blend in again, for the sake of my sanity as well as those around me, which have decided that they must worry for me… I have not asked them to worry, nor have I felt that it was at all necessary… I know that whether I remain in this life, or seek another that it is all an illusion… I am part of the oneness, I cannot truly be hurt, and I am never alone; for there is no alone to be… Spirit is with me every step of the way, guiding me as I journey through this human experience…
Next up an ordinary job, an ordinary home, an ordinary life, as an extraordinary being… It is time to learn to live in this city and state, as I did in another country… It is time to remember what it looks like to live for me, to choose for me, to navigate what it means to be true to me… What energy space and consciousness can I be that allows me to be me, in a world of the ordinary??? Who am I today, and what grand and glorious adventures am I having??? How does it get even better than that???